I love my job...

What a day Wednesday was!

We started with checking my emails; you never know what surprises await!

A pastoral team meeting followed; which is where we consider how to best support those in the Church who need a little bit more support. The love and care shown within the Church continues to astound me, as does the faithful discipleship of those facing difficulties in life.

A few phone calls follow; including one with a local lady minister in training who is helping with a major outreach project I am involved with and a local baptist pastor. We're meeting on Friday to discuss future joint mission events in Shrewsbury.

Next up came a phone call with a local Church administrator I have much affinity with, having done a similar role here for years. We shared ideas, encouraged one another, and he gave me a useful press contact. We are working together; brilliant.

I had an appointment cancelled due to illness which was sad but helped me to catch up with all sorts of bit and bobs of admin. Urgent but not (that) important bits and pieces.

I found out that the council has allocated £2000 towards a Cage Football project I have been pioneering, giving us £11,000 towards a total cost of £12,000, and adding to the £3,000 I got from the Police. Yet I also received disappointment that further funding has been delayed, leaving me £1000 short. That is a bit gutting to be honest.

Next up came a 2 hour strategic meeting with my fellow elders and some very exciting ideas for the future. As a Church we are 25 years old and established in our town (having successfully planted 2 other Churches): the question now is what do we want to be in 25 years time?

I arrive home to find an email from a local businessman I know through the football club saying he is a trustee of a local charity and he has seen Cage Football in the local paper and wants to fund any shortfall, and if he can't through his charity he will through his business. Can you believe it? 3 hours after the bad news comes the provision. Jehovah is still Jireh yeah?

Back from that and a quick change of gear and a visit to a couple, the chap being the son of some of our Church members. They want a humanist wedding and they want me to lead it because of my positive relationship with him. It was great to spend time with them, affirm their desire to marry, and explain how my faith encourages me to consider all marriage as good. I also said how much I respected their authenticity by not wanting a Church wedding if they don't believe in God.

Back to our Church Centre for the Freedom in Christ course, except now I find that due to illness I need to help with an Alpha group instead. Wow! I have not led an Alpha group for a couple of years but it is goes great. Why did Jesus die? I mean, can you get a better thing to discuss with people on their journey towards faith? Dinner includes Cumberland sausages, what is not to like?

A lady member of our Church who has recently experienced a miscarriage tells me my blog posts on the subject have been a help to her; a precious moment.

As I leave a guy wants a private word and asks me all about the authenticity of Scripture regarding possible copying errors in response to my talk on the Bible in a previous week. Brilliant! Let's have a look.

Home I go, taking a lad home who expresses how helpful Sunday's "Steps to Freedom in Christ" day was for him.

I may be tired as I catch the tail end of the Champions League highlights, but God is good, all the time, but my gosh He is today.

2010 review

Well 2010 has been and gone and so I have an opportunity to reflect on what has gone before.

The two most profound experiences of this year were climbing the Welsh 3000s in the hardest physical challenge I have ever undertaken, and facing a miscarriage in the hardest emotional challenge I have ever faced.

I don't really want to do either of them again, and yet found God in both, in fact, they actually worked together for me.

I officiated my first wedding, conquered Crib Goch, preached my hardest sermon, got the Christian version of a visit from Ofsted, arranged the biggest event of my church life so far, and shared the love with the Vineyard, Steve Chalke, Rob Bell and those loveable Baptists.

Our Frontedge conference and Sunday meeting went brilliantly, and a bunch of new people decided they want to join our Church.

I preached on 10 Sundays here, and led the meeting on a further 18 Sundays, with one guest preach at a local Church. I also preached on two Alpha courses and two Freedom in Christ Courses.

This year has been pretty epic really, a real rollercoaster, and with an overwhelming sense of remembering sadness. The kind of sadness that takes the glow out of the wonderful bits and takes the urgency out of the difficult bits because it just rests over everything and takes the colour out of the world. I can now see the colours again.

The news I am going to be a Daddy was a great way to end the year.

I have learned a lot about myself, and a lot about my wife, a lot about my friends and a lot about my Church. What I knew already about God has stood firm through pressure and been proved true.

I am in faith for 2011 but what that looks like is not going to be in a box because it really is up to Him, because no matter what it is He'll be there with us.

2010: How did I get on?

Back in 2010 I set some goals.

How did I get on?

1) To read the whole bible, cover to cover

Well, I am in the midst of Isaiah so just over half way. The format started off strongly, then tailed off a bit, and now I am back in the groove. In the meantime I did my own thing for a little while. The repetition in Chronicles / Kings / Samuel etc bogged me down last time I read right the way through again and I found myself wandering again.

2) To do the 3 peak challenge

Nope, failed.

3) To do the Snowdonia 14 challenge

Done it!

4) To use this blog to be loving towards more things. To talk up the kingdom. And to be real.

I have shared the love a litte bit more, and have certainly not held back fromt he reality of my journey.

5) I would like to do more to please the heart of my God, my wife, my family and my Church.

I guess they are the ones to be the judge of that. If you see them, ask them!

Back to the desk...

Time to close the door on the festive season for another year.

Time to open 3 weeks of emails.

Time to wonder why I never get letters any more that aren't junk mail?

Time to plan: leaders meetings, elders meetings, cell group overseers meetings, pastoral meetings.

Time to think about what went well this Christmas, the guests we had, the visitors.

Time to consider the sadness of the Church member who sadly died over Christmas.

Time to consider the ladies day at the end of the month, the launch of Freedom in Christ and the launch of the Alpha Course.

Time to contact speakers for mission events later this year.

Time to think.

What an exciting time ahead!

Manflu

I hate "manflu".

Headache, shivers, sore throat, runny nose, uncontrollable sneezing, lethargy.

I felt rough on Sunday but lasted out two Sunday meetings but then knew I needed to slow down.

Monday was a day in bed, showering at 5.15pm when I decided to "get up".

Tuesday saw me attempt two meetings before going home at lunch while Wednesday has seen me knocked out at home, just a few emails winging around.

I feel miserable, and I don't like being miserable. Grumpy is not even in my nature, and yet feeling like this just seems to evoke grumpiness!

It has been a long time since I lost 3 days in a row to being poorly. Still, at least the Cat has had some company!

Holiday Reading

For the last week you (may) have been reading automatic posts.

We are in Turkey.

On holiday.

Esther's first ever package holiday.

My first ever all inclusive.

My holiday reading says a lot about me.

My bible. The latest issue of Four Four Two. The latest issue of The Economist. And two books on Cell Church.

Looking forward to understanding more about the Lord, more about the Church and more about the world of football, in that order!

Peace

A week in the Lake District.

No email.

No internet.

Minor mobile phone use: (mostly to try and locate my wife!)

Peace.

Peace in the hills.

Peace on the Lake. (Not walking!, rowing)

Sometimes holidays can be a great adventure. Sometimes I just like to chill. This was a la carte chilling, carefully woven, delicate, and real nourishment for the soul.

The Welsh 3000s Part Five

As you may know by now, we completed this tough challenge in 19 hours, 55 minutes.

Good job my kit was up to it!

It was great to be part of a good team and we were reliant on excellent support.

Time for a bit of vulnerability from me. The truth is that things have been tough over the last few weeks because we lost a pregnancy. It has been a very dark time for Esther and I. I may well blog more about it in the future but we are just concentrating on getting through it for now.

I had been training since January 1^st for this challenge. I had been training hard, doing a 9.5 mile circuit in South Shropshire fairly often. Five a side football on Mondays, circuit training on Tuesdays or Thursdays or both, then off to the hills at the weekend. When time allowed we had a couple of trips to Snowdonia just to acclimatise.

I was also supposed to do the “Three Peak” challenge, the highest peaks in Wales, England and Scotland in 24 hours. That was 3 weeks before the Bread challenge and would give me a good indicator as to how I was doing.

That was the day we had to go to hospital to undergo “medical management” to help sort out the failed pregnancy. It was a grim day. There is nothing that prepares you for that. You want it to be “over” in one sense and yet you never want it to end. You want another scan, the one that says all the others were a mistake and a little heart is beating.

So I had issues in my head. The opportunity to do a big challenge I had been training for six months to do had been taken away by the worst possible reason. It was dire. Of course the mountains did not matter compared to our family, but it all mushed up inside my head.

Fast forward 3 weeks and the Bread challenge is upon me, I have unfinished business. Unfinished business with my own heart. Unfinished business with the mountains. And if I am honest unfinished business with God.

An email came around the week before from Neal saying “It is a good idea to name each peak after a friend or loved one to help count them down and add significance”. Great idea!

I named one peak.

Number 15. Foel Fras.

Baby.

Our epic adventure started at 3.15am with the alarm clock, and by 3.55am we were walking in horrendous weather up Crib Goch, an exposed ridge on the ascent of Snowdon which was the first peak of the challenge. The weather was simply horrendous. The peaks slowly started to tick by. In the rain and the mist and the friendship and the teamwork I could only really think of baby. The hours went by, peak 7, peak 8, getting ever closer.

So it was that sometime in the evening in the mist of the Carneddau range a tired and wet Dave approached the summit of Foel Fras, the fifteenth peak with my jubilant team. We were all delighted. High fives and photos finished, a moment of silence. We had done it.

I held the summit cairn in both hands, the wet rock gleaming in the light of my head torch. This was the moment.

“Lord, I give my baby to you. I release them into your care. I want to say that I love you. I will follow you. And I ask you to help me to continue to live for you”

I did not get closure.

I did not want closure.

I got peace.

Closure is an end. Closure is a door slammed shut. Closure is the finish of a journey. I did not want that.

This is the start of our journey, not the end. I have started my journey of fatherhood, it is just for whatever reason I don't have the priviledge of bringing this one up.

So I didn't want closure, I wanted peace.

I wanted a peace that says yes this is wrong, yes this is not what it was meant to be, yes this hurts like hell and no there is not an answer, except in the loving arms of a loving God who draws all things to himself through His son Jesus.

In rain like that you do not have to hide your tears.

As we trudged on in the endless descent down to the minibus and support waiting to pick us up I knew something had changed. Something deep inside. The part of me that died when baby died. The bit of me that could not go on my great adventure because we had to go to hospital instead. The bit of me that still hopes for the future day when I can walk hand in hand with my child to the football ground is at peace.

Peace with God, and maybe even at peace with myself. He is loving. He is strong. Baby is in His care, and so are we.

The Welsh 3000s Part 4

We completed this tough challenge in 19 hours, 55 minutes.

Good job my kit was up to it!

It was great to be part of a good team.

Next up in terms of important things was our "support"

Firstly: the Pen Y Pass youth hostel had been booked early so we had the best place in Snowdonia to start from, result.

Once returning from Snodown to Nant Peris we entered a hive of activity. Fresh water, a gazebo, a stove, hot drinks, sausage and bacon rolls, clothes lines for wet kit, plasters, encouragement, all there.

Off we trooped onto the Glyders and then having returned to down to Llyn Ogwen, there they were, minibus, gazebo, hot drinks, fresh water, pasta meal, goodie bags with flapjacks and fruit, bananas, another hot drink, encouragement.

Off we trudged, up the Carneddau.

Imagine my surprise, at 11.55pm that evening, to catch a glimpse of the minibus in the distance, and next to it, the gazebo, it can't be can it? A fresh mug of tea thrust into my hand, awesome!

Two first aiders went to help out one guy who had hurt himself slightly. My headtorch failed in the wet and the support team lent me one. Whatever you needed, if they could fix it they did. And they could see the weather, so they could look you in the eye and tell you that you were doing brilliantly.

All in all, I know you can do this challenge in one straight walk or with just a couple of cars at each point but I found having people around, knowing there was a plan B, and a mug of Tea, gave the whole thing a much more friendly face and meant that we felt much less isolated.

You can just take your kit and disappear off into the mist and crack on if that floats your boat, but having a skilled, available, well organised support team increases your chances to completing it vastly.

The Welsh 3000s Part 3

We completed this tough challenge in 19 hours, 55 minutes.

Good job my kit was up to it!

The next key thing for me was straightforward, teamwork.

Now being in a newfrontiers Church means I rarely have anything to do with anything that does not involve either being part of a team, or helping encourage a team, or receiving input from a team. So it did not come as too much of a shock that our overall group of 14 was split into 3 teams. To my surprise I found myself in a group that was expected to both complete the challenge and do it the fastest. In the end we did so, ahead by about an hour, but it was a surprise for me to be placed there.


I was put in a group with Cameron (bright green jacket), a local senior fire officer. In the woolly hat, Keith, a worship leader in our Church and a manager in a plastics firm. On the left Neal (Waggy), an IT consultant and in the orange on the right, our esteemed team leader Steve, local teacher and fell running champion.

The weather was grim, but you know what, it was fun. A genuinely fun 20 hours. Plenty of banter. Lots of laughter. A bit of shared lamenting at the sheer relentlessness of the rain. There was help for one another, plasters to go on feet, shared kit, borrowed tops, socks, towels, whatever you needed to get through someone had something in the bottom of a pack somewhere to help make it happen. Food shared out, "Anyone want any Jelly babies" started a scramble!

I cannot use a compass. I am ok with maps in decent visibility. There was no visibility, I needed Steve. That said on the way up Tryfan I knew exactly where the path we needed was because I had climbed it 4 weeks before so I could help lead the way.

There was a lad we met on the way up who was doing the challenge on his own. He had camped up at the top and so was 1-2 hours ahead of us starting. By about 6pm we found him in one of the summit shelters on the Carneddau. His GPS had failed and he was a bit stuck, so he had waited for one of our teams to catch him up. Room for one more in the team? You bet!

I watch stuff like "band of brothers" and wonder what it must have been like to have that level of reliance and shared intense experience with others. In doing this challenge I had just a small glimpse of what it might be like. It also reminded me of what Sid the Sloth says in Ice Age Two, "We are the weirdest herd I have ever seen". Different personalities, different skills, different levels of fitness, all bringing what they had to the table to make it happen. Steve could have done it in half the time, on his own. But he didn't, and that is why I was able to complete it too. There has to be something worth learning from that.

The Welsh 3000s Part 2

Our walk on Saturday was a tough, tough challenge.

This video was taken by Stuart, a member of our team, on the Crib Goch arete on Snowdon.



So what did I learn? Well, four key things I learned, and then something more personal.

1) YOUR KIT NEEDS TO BE GOOD

To do something like this, you really, really need the right kit. I made some good decisions in the build up which really benefited me on the day.

COAT: Rab Drillium 3 layer eVENT fabric: kept the worst of the water out and was still beading after a near 10 hours of constant rain. The wired hood is excellent for visibility and the pockets are big enough to stash stuff you need close at hand.

BOOTS: Karrimor KSBs with Vibram sole & eVENT lining. Coped with some extreme weather very well: if not waterproof, at least robust!

SOCKS: Bridgedale Endurance Trekker: fresh pair on the day. It is going to be a long slog and your feet normally give up first. Coolmax liners gave my feet that little extra comfort.

FLEECE: I don't normally wear a fleece much because I overheat easily, but there was very little danger of that at 3000 feet in winds of 40mph, so it was invaluable to have my Rab fleece. Especially by the end as darkness fell, the rain started up again and I was getting tired.

BASELAYER: Over 32 miles you are going to sweat, so a Berghaus technical baselayer was my preferred option to keep as much moisture away from me as possible.

LEGS: I need some leg protection, I need it to dry quickly, I need it to withstand rocks and mud and bumps and slips. A trusty pair of Ronhill leggings fit the bill perfectly. I also got some athletes wicking boxer shorts: a wise move when you wear them for that long!

WATERPROOF TROUSERS: If was going to rain a bit (as if!) then overtrousers help, not least to keep the wind off wet legs. I went with some North Face ones in the January sale. They survived a 20 foot slide down a grassy bank trying to get off Snowdon, and kept the wind out brilliantly.

BACKPACK: With two refuelling points with our support team I knew I could travel fairly light, hence just a 25 litre Innov8 Race Elite 25 Rucksack. A pack like that is not really designed for a battering in the rocks, but it weighed nearly 800g less than an equivalent Berghaus pack I own, and that is another 800ml of fluid to carry so given the choice I would rather have the drink!

ACCESSORIES: A few little wise decisions came good: windproof fleece gloves stood up to everything the weather threw at them, and still gripped the rocks. A waterproof fleece lined hat and a waterproof beanie gave me different options. Everything within my rucksack was kept in separate Exped bags and that was the best decision I made, as others with carrier bags etc found themselves waterlogged quickly.

NUTRITION / PREPARATION: I took at least 2.5l with me on each stage, and drunk a mixture of 500ml water and next time 500ml of Nuun electrolyte drink which puts the salts you lose sweating back in. I have never got on with "Camelbaks" because I don't know how much fluid I have left, and I lose breath when I stop to suck them. So I just used 500ml bottles of Tesco mineral water costing £1.28 for 6, which I emptied one at a time into a 500ml plastic bottle as part of a Raidlight system on my pack, so drink was always accessible. For food I took a selection of different cereal bars, some SIS energy bars, some SIS energy gels, a few jelly babies, salted nuts, plenty of "Go ahead" biscuits and bars, some of those "School bars" which are basically fruit sugar in a stick, and some Snickers. I ate something at least every hour, and drunk 500ml at least every 2 hours. I was so grateful to have such a selection because at some times I just fancied one thing, so could pick and choose.

And yet: despite all my preparations, planning, searching for bargains on the internet, trying out my pack, working out the best way to pack it, which exact items I wanted to take, it still was not "enough". By that I mean having started out at 3.55am by 5am all of us were soaked to the skin, with boots full of water. Such was the horrendous weather, driving horizontal rain, and the fact we were scrambling up and down rocks in it. And that meant having the decent kit became a much more important issue, because although my comfort was challenged, I now needed my boots to grip wet rock. I needed my socks to stop blisters while full of water. I needed my clothes to dry quickly, and not cause me discomfort by rubbing when wet.

All in all: they worked perfectly! All my stuff took a hiding and 19 hours 55 minutes later I arrived safe and sound, with not a single blister, not a single scratch, and just a couple of bruised toes from an over enthusiastic descent of Tryfan.

Had I not had the right kit I would have been stuffed at 5am, on top of Crib Goch, in that weather.

Would I change anything? Well, with hindsight I may go for a longer jacket at some stage like the Berghaus Long Cornice so the run off from my jacket is not so close to waist height. I may also go for Seal Skinz socks to give me another waterproof layer for my feet. Other than that I would do very little different, and will always remember my secret weapon: Sudocrem! I reapplied during the breaks: and was not sunk by the scourge of chaffing, which has ruined many a walk for me. 19 hours in wet or damp clothes, and not a hint.

There are three more key learnings which I will post about in due course.

The Welsh 3000s

On Saturday I completed the task of walking all 15 3000ft peaks in Wales within 24 hours. Our final time was 19 hours, 55 minutes.

It was wet, so wet. Horizontal rain, gloomy mist, gosh it was grim.

You know what? That actually made it better! It was supposed to be a challenge right? 12300 feet of ascent, and 32 miles! I know what: let's make them soaked to the skin within half an hour and in wet boots for the full length: that will sort the men from the boys!

If you ever start a 32 mile walk and it looks like this, quit! I am the one in the green on the left.

If anyone ever offers you a trip up Crib Goch, and the weather is like this, decline! What an adventure. It is not like this sitting behind a desk checking my email.

The top of Snowdon. Visibility less than 20 feet. Winds up to 40mph and very, very wet. Lovely!


Elidir Fawr was the second big climb up onto a mountain range of the day and a dull endless trudge into the mist to reach just the 4th peak. I didn't know he was taking this photo and was alone with my thoughts so I think my facial expression says a lot. Probably "I don't want to be here, I don't want to do this"!

Summit 5, Y Garn. There are times in a man's life when you just fancy a cheesy roll. What is this? Nestling neatly in a waterproof sandwich bag? Happy days!

Tryfan is a decent slog up in the dry. In the wet, with water pouring back down over the rocks, cascading under your hands and feet as you look for your next hold is more challenging. Great fun though! Having done the Glyders I was a bit low to be honest but scrambling up Tryfan was such fun that it lifted the spirits again.

Having descended Tryfan again it was a big slog up from Llyn Ogwen to get to the top of Pen Yr Ole Wen. The 9th peak, but pretty special because we were now up on the Carneddau, and on our final mountain range.

Summit 12, Carnedd Llewellyn. Just 21m shy of the height on Snowdon, oh such a long time ago! Not that you could see much apart from the guy in front of you!

Looking tired now, as the 13th peak, Foel Grach, gets ticked off. With darkness setting in, the rain continues and the wind stirs up again, lovely.

Now we need 3 full hands to count the peaks!

Jubilation on peak 15, Foel Fras. Smiles and high fives all round, before setting off on the long (several miles still to go) descent into the darkness to find the car and some warmth.

It is not too late to sponsor us, with all monies going to a great charity called Breadtrust doing some really, really important work in Eastern Europe, especially Ukraine.

Next up I will post what I learned about myself, about the guys I was with, and a really profound experience I had at the fifteenth peak.

Will you sponsor me?

From 4am tomorrow morning a team of us are climbing all 15 3000ft mountains in Snowdonia in 24 hours.

This amounts to just over 30 miles, and over 12,000 feet of ascent, in a day.

We are doing it for a local Christian charity called Bread Trust, who work in Eastern Europe.

Please sponsor us via this online giving page

Training

Nope, this is not a post about bible college, it is a post about my legs!

1 Corinthians 9:24-26

²⁴Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

²⁵Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. ²⁶Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air."

With two big walking challenges coming up this year I am in training. Not yet "strict" training, but training all the same.

Monday morning saw me do the usual loop. The Lawley (1237 ft), Caer Caradoc (1506ft), then Hope Bowdler Hill, and back over Caradoc and the Lawley and back to the car. We think it is about 8.5 miles but it is really difficult to work out the total ascent. The Lawley and Caradoc are both brutally steep in places, which does not come across in this photo, but perhaps the distance does.

I am hoping for a GPS print out after my friend recorded it on their phone to work out exactly what we do, but it hurts, and that must be good.

So now it is all about the times I can do. I don't have time for many "whole day" walks or even getting up to Snowdonia much in the run up, so I am trying to get my teeth into what I can do locally. My time of doing the loop was about three and a half hours. This reduced to three hours ten, then by running bits of it I got that down to two hours fifty. On Monday I made it in 2 hours thirty four. I think two thirty is achievable, and two twenty a further goal.

By the end of July hopefully I will have been successful in the "games" I am aiming for, but more so, maybe God is teaching me something about grit and determination to achieve a goal.

Progress report

At the beginning of this year I set various goals.

Here is how I am doing!

I have arranged to do the 3 Peaks on June 19th in aid of the British Heart Foundation and Oasis Trust, then the Snowdon 15 on July 10th in aid of Bread Trust. I have been training on saturday mornings, with a hearty 8.5 mile walk in South Shropshire. Up the lawley, caer caradoc, hope bowdler, then back over caer caradoc and the lawley.

Once the weather improves I will be up into Snowdonia on the weekend getting some practice in, including Crib Goch (pictured)


My bible reading is going ok but I am currently lost in the wilderness of Leviticus. 70 days into the year I am on day 47 of the notes. This is not good. A forthcoming holiday will see me do battle with the history of the Jewish nation and we will see where we go from there.

My weight is static at just over 12 stone, so some work to do there, but I am hoping these mountains take their toll.

Am I being loving? I hope so. I have daily opportunities to show grace in all sorts of circumstances. I know God is doing something in my character, during what still feels like an "apprenticeship" stage of life.

Back to blogging

I lost my blogging mojo for a few weeks but I think it is on its way back.

I think I got a bit depressed reading bits of the blogosphere and will try to focus on my journey a little bit more.

Our 5 a side football has gone a bit crazy and we get 7 or 8 per team at the moment which is chaotic!

On Sunday we played 11 a side against a local college and emerged 5-2 winners.

On Tuesday I was in a discussion about "reaching the 20s-30s". I couldn't help but think of our team photo.

Let's keep being who we are and doing what we do, and reach people when who we are and what we do touches their life.

Generosity

I don't really do speechless.

I am rather chatty. If anything I say too much, too quickly.

it was my birthday recently and a parcel arrived at the Church centre.

I opened it up and saw a "Wii" logo. I wondered why I would have a Wii accessory when I don't have a Wii.

But the box was really heavy, and as I turned it over it became clear it was a Wii. A black Wii with Wii sports resort and a motion plus controller.

I literally couldn't speak. I just stood there, like a right lemon. I sat down, still trying to work out what was going on.

I have wanted a Wii for ages. A seriously long time. I have played my friends, and even have gaming nights where people bring their own Wii to my house. I love Nintendo, and always have done. From the gameboy to the SNES, N64 and Cube I have grown up with MarioKart and others as the staple diet of what to do when having mates over.

So there we are. Rendered speechless buy a completely out of the blue, unjustified, unmerited and still slightly bemusing act of generosity. I am still a bit stunned to be honest.

Manflu

I don't like having manflu.

It is such a debilitating illness.

I don't like the way people think you are not really ill.

Be honest, you don't think I am really ill either.

If you are a bloke you are sweating because you remember how bad your last bout was.

If you are a girl you think I have a light cold and should stop moaning.

I think there should be more research into this energy sapping condition.

Until that point, just another half an hour before my next installment of paracetemol.

Honesty

I think Tim has got a point.

I want to be honest.

That requires two things, honouring the good and owning the bad.

It means being vulnerable and positive, clear and down to earth.

Hopefully this blog is honest.

Hopefully you realise I don't have it all together.

Hopefully you see our Church is not perfect, nor is our movement of churches.

This may sound really cheesy, but I actually want the only "promotion" on here to be promotion of the grace of God. For grace to work there must be reality as to the pain, trials, sin and restoration in my life.

Two of the most dangerous areas I think are introductions for visiting speakers, and introductions of the author of a book. Both of them require a certain "spin" on who they are, how great a friend they are, what a great Church they have, how many souls they have won, in order to vindicate the message.

I wonder what the consequences would be if I introduced a visiting speaker like this. "Hi, this morning our speaker is XXXXX XXXXXX from XXXXXXXXX. Although saved and on a path of discipleship he still clearly bares marks of his fallen nature, in both personality and actions. Some of his mistakes have scared me, others make my toes curl. In fact, of all the people I know, the grace of God is most evident in him. And through him, his failures, I have seen God's ability to use fallen man for his glory. Just looking at him you won't really guess why we have invited him here this morning, but give him a chance."

The scary thing, is that I could be introducing the Apostle Paul, maybe Peter, who knows.

I certainly get really uncomfortable when I hear other people describing this Church as it always seems really great and does not represent some of the challenges. I think deep down most of us compare ourselves to that great Church up the road or in the next town or in the big city. I am almost certain if I went to that Church I would find the same problems, the same broken people, the same misunderstandings and all the things that make Church messy, because that is what life is like.

So there we go: honesty it is. Thanks Tim.

Goals for 2010

A new year, time for some fresh challenges for 2010.

1) To read the whole bible, cover to cover

2) To do the 3 peak challenge

3) To do the Snowdonia 14 challenge

4) To use this blog to be loving towards more things. To talk up the kingdom. And to be real.

5) I would like to do more to please the heart of my God, my wife, my family and my Church.

Should be an interesting 12 months!